Alien Games Ch. 3
Feb. 4th, 2009 11:34 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
emeraldsnakesSummary: Cameron Mitchell didn't believen in aliens, but when he was ten years old a blue box appeared in his backyard. These are his adventures though time and space. Part of the Sentinels 'verse.
Disclaimer: I don't own Doctor Who or Stargate
Words: 3,652
Chapter Three
In all my life I've only been sick a few times, and never really seriously. I've seen my brothers sick with all kinds of illnesses, yet I've never seemed to catch it from them. Even the common cold, which everyone catches from time to time, I never got. I thought it was normal for there to be some people who never got sick at all, but as I grew up I realized it wasn't. It didn't matter though, I'd seen sick people and never wanted to end up like them, so I was glad I was different.
I was quick to realize that just because he was called The Doctor, he wasn't much of one if it came to something he'd never encountered before. I mean, he was brilliant in diagnosing illnesses of every living thing and some things that weren't living, but he wasn't a doctor in any sense of the term. He has no bed side manner what so ever and his doctor skills only worked in the diagnosing department. I'd be terrified if someone came up to him and said, "Here, you're a doctor. This man needs surgery." and gave him all the tools he'd need. Fixing the TARDIS was nothing like fixing a human, or any other kind of alien.
Vanguard was a human colonized planet. Years later I would wonder if these people were related to the Asgard in some way. Their entire planet had references to Norse mythology, like the Asgard's entire civilization was but at the time I visited this was not what I thought about. It was a high end and advanced planet in the 98th Century and a place The Doctor had often visited for their High Councilor, a man by the name of Thoran, (Son of Thor, apparently) was a good friend of his.
Thoran was an exceptionally tall human with a bit of alien in him. I don't know what species it was, The Doctor said he wasn't sure because it was such a diluted line and at it could have been from several different races. The alien in him turned Thoran a light blue colour making him look almost dead. It was unnerving and when I first met him I hid behind the Doctor and buried my face in the leg of his pants.
Once I got over Thoran's differences I realized he was a pretty nice guy. I became intrigued by his differences and when I met his daughter we became fast friends. Shifa was a year younger than I was and incredibly intelligent, which became a little annoying when she started using word's I'd never heard of before. She'd explain them though and it would all make sense.
Sometimes when traveling with The Doctor I wished Shifa was there with me to explain the words I didn't know. A lot of what The Doctor said went over my head, I'm sure it went over many of his companions' heads. Sometimes I'd wish I was as smart as Shifa, that I could speak with that air of intelligence because when I was around her, and later The Doctor I felt a little stupid.
I got over it though. Shifa taught me a lot of new words and after I returned home it was another thing my parents noticed. My teachers noticed too, tried to get me into a higher grade because I'd started showing signs of things I'd learned on my travels but I refused to take any tests, any reasoning from both my teacher and parents and eventually they gave up.
Shifa showed me around the Vanguard capital city with an escort of guards. Midgard was beautiful but we were only allowed to travel in certain areas. I figured it was because the areas we couldn't go were dangerous so thought nothing of it. I liked where we did travel to. Shifa showed me the National Vanguard Museum, one of the sections having a detailed history of Vanguards development and though it wasn't all that interesting Shifa made it so. She knew here stuff, had a knowledge far beyond her years that I didn't understand how it could be all in her brain. I asked her once if she thought her head would explode if she crammed anymore knowledge in there. She was not impressed and didn't speak to me for an hour, till she got annoyed with my butchering of Vanguard pronunciation, and had to explain it to me.
Dinner in the High Councilor's home was a strange affair. There were so many rules that I had to follow, proper etiquette and all that which made no sense to me but, as I was sitting beside Shifa I was able to get it mastered to a reasonable level. I could follow nowhere near as well as The Doctor but I did pretty well for myself. There was no such thing as desert, no sweet treat for me to eat after I'd finished all the nasty healthy stuff. It was disappointing and after explaining it to Shifa she looked at me like I was crazy.
"Why would you want to eat something like that? Sweets are disgusting."
I couldn't believe what I was hearing, "Chocolate, ice cream, macaroons? What do you eat for a snack?"
She shrugged, "Quita."
Translation: Pineapple, or something very similar and it's disgusting. I don’t like pineapple for one, so why would I like alien pineapple? Everything about Shifa I later categorized about why girls were weird and thus why I didn't like them. This was at the top of my list because who in their right mind could not like macaroons. Especially grandma's homemade macaroons, they're the most amazing thing in the world.
That night as I was exploring my room more in depth because I wasn't yet tired, and probably wouldn't be for another several hours I heard outside the door the High Councilor and the chief soldier who'd escorted Shifa and I around Midgard. They were talking about a different part of Midgard, the part Shifa and I hadn't been allowed to go to. I didn't quite understand what they were talking about but it made me curious and itching to go there and explore.
I waited a little while and snuck to Shifa's room. I woke her up and it too me almost half an hour to convince her to come exploring with me. She was not pleased with whatever it was that made me want to go against her father's rules, but what could I say, I'm a rule breaker. Sneaking out of the mansion was actually quite easy for the two of us, and Shifa was surprisingly adept at it.
Old Midgard was nothing like the area we'd been to earlier. It was part of the lower levels, far less advanced and partially run down. It had a spooky quality to it that, although frightening, intrigued me. It was what made us continue exploring. There were so many foreign smells, exotic and nasty swirling together in a mesh of intricacies that were so amazing they made me giddy inside. Shifa was quite suck up as we walked through the streets, peering at everything and keeping an eye out on where we were going. Which was a good thing because I probably wouldn't have been able to make it back on my own.
Shifa didn't know much about Old Midgard and it was quite obvious by her attitude that she was only mildly interested in the place but was there because I wanted to be. She indulged me and for that I was grateful.
I know with all my heart that I should never have gone down there, I knew it at the time but I thought we were safe. I didn't think any harm would come from exploring, it's what The Doctor and I did all the time. Looking back on it I know that it wasn't the best move to make, because with The Doctor around I at least had someone who could save my life when needed, or just generally fix whatever problems I got myself into.
But I didn't have The Doctor with me, and the problem I'd gotten myself into didn't present itself until the next day, when I woke up. On out little excursion Shifa and I literally ran into a strange man who could speak. He tried to, like he was use to saying words but had somehow lost the ability, and then ran off. We didn't think anything of it, didn't try and find out why, or anything even remotely similar. We just continued to explore until Shifa begged me to go back. I did, because I could see she was getting tired, and by that time I was as well. We went back up to the high end, into the mansion like we'd left and no one found out we'd been gone. I was under the impression no one would find out, but come morning everything changed.
When I woke up it was almost midday. I changed into the fresh pair of clothing that someone had left out for me and made my way to find something to eat. As I passed someone in the hallway I said hi to them. They didn't hear me and it took a moment for me to realize that I didn't hear me. I stopped walking, spoke again and though I was moving my mouth, nothing came out. I screamed, tried whatever I could to make a verbal sound all the while growing more panicked.
I ran to The Doctor, screaming as I went but once I came to the doors to the dining room I closed my mouth. I silently slipped in, The Doctor and High Councilor were at the far end, casually dining though they weren't actually eating anything. They had drinks though, and Shifa was there eating her morning meal.
I walked up to The Doctor and pulled on his jacket. He ignored me and I pulled harder which made him look down at me with a glare before turning back to the High Councilor. Something in me screamed at him for that, because though we rarely ever asked anything of each other, especially me asking something from him because I was so young, whenever I did need him it was always for something important. Ignoring me at that moment made me question what I was to him, if I'd outstayed my welcome because although I didn't know how long we'd been traveling it had been quite a while but that point.
I stood there for a minute in shock before pulling his jacket again. He batted my hand away and in childish rage I smacked him. He turned to me shocked, angry and a whole other host of emotions I didn't recognize.
"What Cameron?" he asked annoyed.
I had his attention now, but I didn't want to 'speak' about it here so I hit him again and ran.
"Cameron!" he yelled at me and I stopped at the doorway and looked back at him suddenly terrified. "Come here, right now."
I wanted to obey, every instinct was screaming at me to do so, but I knew I couldn’t because I didn't want the others to know. I shook my head and left the room quickly. I could hear The Doctor apologizing to the High Councilor and his chair scrape back as he stood. That was when I started running and headed to the TARDIS. It was the only place I really felt safe and it was what I needed at the moment.
I was in my room when he found me, sitting on my bed, wrapped up in my blanket and waiting. He was annoyed, angry, confused and I was just being difficult. He sat on the bed with me, staring at me like I was some sort of mystery to be solved, and perhaps at the time I was because, as I said before, I was being difficult.
"I was having a very important discussion Cameron, you had no right to interrupt me like that," he told me seriously.
I nodded, knowing he was true, and waited.
He sighed, disapprovingly, "You have my undivided attention now Cameron, what is it that you wanted?"
I tried talking to him and like I'd already known, nothing came out. The Doctor looked at me funnily, face all screwed up in a way only he knew how, like he didn't get it. I waved my hands around in a desperate attempt to get him to understand what was going on and it only took me nearly five blood minutes to do so.
"You can't speak," The Doctor mumbled. I nodded rapidly and tentatively inched towards him. He stood up and I felt shafted, because I wanted him to hug me, tell me everything was going to be ok and then run off to find a cure.
He knelt in front of me, "Where did you go Cameron?" He paused for a moment when I didn't answer, "Right. Erm….I know!"
He dashed out of my room and I curled into myself a bit more, wrapped tighter in my blanket because I wanted him right there at that moment and he just couldn't see it. He came back with a notebook and a pen and set in on the bed beside me. I looked at it for a moment before taking them both and began writing. I gave it to him when I was finished and waited for his reaction.
"Cameron," he scolded, "Why did you run off? Didn't you think that there was a reason you weren't allowed to go down to Old Midgard earlier? I'm disappointed in you, you put both yourself and Shifa in danger and now you can't speak! I need to speak to the High Councilor about this, see what exactly is going on. Stay here."
He left me, was gone for what felt like hours during which I curled up into a ball on the far side of my bed, up against the wall and cried till I'd fallen asleep.
O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.
The Doctor has terrible bedside manner, and he was especially terrible at making me feel wanted. Two days after I was suddenly rendered mute we found out I was dying. Something about the Silence Plague I'd caught had mutated and had begun paralyzing me. There was no order to the paralysis. By that time I couldn't feel my legs nor part of my arms. I'd been moved from my TARDIS room so that other doctors could look after me.
I was alone most of the time. Actually not really because Shifa spent most of her time with me, but the one person I wanted there was rarely ever there. I don't know what he was doing nor do I know why he never came to see me.
Shifa sat on the bad with me. It had already been determined that she was, for some reason immune to the Silence, and she would talk to me. Sometime she would read to me, a story usually but when it wasn't it was one of her strange study books. We quickly developed a way for her to realize I wasn't understanding something she was saying. Head nods and deliberate facial expressions let her know when she needed to repeat something or go into it more deeply. It worked for us very well, so well in fact that the doctors asked for her to be our 'translator' when he needed to ask questions.
It was during the time which no one was around that I began to long for my family. I wanted to hear my mother's voice again, use the broomsticks as swords against my brothers, walk into my father's hospital room and continue to hear stories about flying planes even though he would no longer be able to. I missed doing chores, I missed grandma's macaroons and most of all I missed my regular human life.
The Doctor doesn't understand. l don't think it's possible for him too. His entire life has been spent traveling the universe and partaking in everything it has to offer. For him, this is the normal life. He finds our race so curious yet strange in our guest to retain a normal life. There's no such thing as a normal life. But I wanted to go back to what I was use to, I needed it, because, though I didn't Know it at the time, l was losing myself. Family didn't much care by that point, and why would it when you're off traveling the stars. But, for the first time since leaving home I missed them, and I remembered what it was like being with them, and I missed them even more.
I began to hate The Doctor for showing up, for offering to show me the universe. Why did he have to do this to me, show me what was really out there? Why did I have to agree?
A lot of these thoughts seem too deep for a mere ten year old but I was never a mere ten year old to begin with. I was always at the top of my class and had a comprehension far better than anyone else. It was why, when I started using far more complex words and numbering that they believed I truly was turning into a genius.
Shifa once told me she was sorry. Sorry for what I don't know because she didn't have anything to be sorry for. I think she felt bad about me getting sick and her staying perfectly healthy, but it was never her fault. I was the one who had dragged us down there. Still, l had wished The Doctor had thought it punishment enough that I was dying and come visit me.
As the paralysis took hold of more and more of my body Shifa was allowed to visit me less and less. The day's passed by so slowly. With nothing to do I began to think more and more of home, what I'd do when I returned. There was so much I could do, I vaguely remembered that my birthday was coming up. I vaguely remembered that Raymond's birthday had just past and that Connor was really angry he had to wait until nearly the end of the year before his own birthday. I was so lost in my own little world that I didn't realize the paralysis had hit my neck.
I actually thought I would die. All the faith that I had in The Doctor saving me was gone. He meant nothing to me, no one meant anything.
I had a nightmare that Darien, the astral squid person, had actually been able to eat my heart, but that I hadn't actually died. I still walked around in my body, but it was dead. I was dead. Everything around me was dead because for some reason, my heart had given Darien a power he could never have dreamed of.
I woke up, and I would have been crying, if I'd been able to. During that nightmare every last control over my body I'd had was taken away and I knew I was going to die that day if I wasn't cured. Those were the worst hours of my life. I couldn't move anything, couldn't open my eyes to see and it was increasingly getting harder to breath. I morbidly wondered if I would die first from heart failure or suffocation, which wasn't something I should have thought of.
Obviously, I didn't die. I later found out that it was the fault of the High Councilor that the Silence had broken out. All the Councilors had used the people as tests to see if the Silence Plague worked and what effect it would have on different people. They'd had it pretty contained and controlled until I'd shown up and started dying. From the blood of the High Councilor, which had been used to initially create the plague, the Doctor had synthesized me a cure.
I recovered on the TARDIS. After making sure I was able to be moved The Doctor had transferred me because he no longer trusted the High Councilor. He sat over me vigilantly, running his hands through my hair. It was a comfort as I slowly regained control of everything but I hated him for it. I hated that he thought he could win me back by being there now, completely forgetting his absence, or ignoring it. He had another thing coming, he really did.
It took me four days to recover fully. When I woke up I went out into the main room of the TARDIS where The Doctor was at the controls, fiddling with them.
"So," The Doctor said as I walked in. "I was thinking maybe Deva Loka. Pretty planet, paradise too so I know there'll be no problems. What do you say?"
"I want to go home."
I've never seen The Doctor's face fall like that, never seen the light in his eyes go out like that. He was just suddenly cold, suddenly unresponsive and for a moment I regretted that things had come to this but he had already hurt me, and I just wanted to go home.
"I want to go home Doctor."
His response was stiff and silent. A nod before he began adjusting the TARDIS controls and setting us of. He didn't talk, didn't try to convince me to stay, or even ask me why I wanted to go home. He didn't look at me, I didn't look at him and even the TARDIS seemed to be sad.
We landed with a particularly jolting thud and I immediately ran out the door, not even bothering to say good bye. Not listening to him as he called me back earnestly. I didn't care, because all I wanted to do was go home.
Chapter Four
Disclaimer: I don't own Doctor Who or Stargate
Words: 3,652
Chapter Three
In all my life I've only been sick a few times, and never really seriously. I've seen my brothers sick with all kinds of illnesses, yet I've never seemed to catch it from them. Even the common cold, which everyone catches from time to time, I never got. I thought it was normal for there to be some people who never got sick at all, but as I grew up I realized it wasn't. It didn't matter though, I'd seen sick people and never wanted to end up like them, so I was glad I was different.
I was quick to realize that just because he was called The Doctor, he wasn't much of one if it came to something he'd never encountered before. I mean, he was brilliant in diagnosing illnesses of every living thing and some things that weren't living, but he wasn't a doctor in any sense of the term. He has no bed side manner what so ever and his doctor skills only worked in the diagnosing department. I'd be terrified if someone came up to him and said, "Here, you're a doctor. This man needs surgery." and gave him all the tools he'd need. Fixing the TARDIS was nothing like fixing a human, or any other kind of alien.
Vanguard was a human colonized planet. Years later I would wonder if these people were related to the Asgard in some way. Their entire planet had references to Norse mythology, like the Asgard's entire civilization was but at the time I visited this was not what I thought about. It was a high end and advanced planet in the 98th Century and a place The Doctor had often visited for their High Councilor, a man by the name of Thoran, (Son of Thor, apparently) was a good friend of his.
Thoran was an exceptionally tall human with a bit of alien in him. I don't know what species it was, The Doctor said he wasn't sure because it was such a diluted line and at it could have been from several different races. The alien in him turned Thoran a light blue colour making him look almost dead. It was unnerving and when I first met him I hid behind the Doctor and buried my face in the leg of his pants.
Once I got over Thoran's differences I realized he was a pretty nice guy. I became intrigued by his differences and when I met his daughter we became fast friends. Shifa was a year younger than I was and incredibly intelligent, which became a little annoying when she started using word's I'd never heard of before. She'd explain them though and it would all make sense.
Sometimes when traveling with The Doctor I wished Shifa was there with me to explain the words I didn't know. A lot of what The Doctor said went over my head, I'm sure it went over many of his companions' heads. Sometimes I'd wish I was as smart as Shifa, that I could speak with that air of intelligence because when I was around her, and later The Doctor I felt a little stupid.
I got over it though. Shifa taught me a lot of new words and after I returned home it was another thing my parents noticed. My teachers noticed too, tried to get me into a higher grade because I'd started showing signs of things I'd learned on my travels but I refused to take any tests, any reasoning from both my teacher and parents and eventually they gave up.
Shifa showed me around the Vanguard capital city with an escort of guards. Midgard was beautiful but we were only allowed to travel in certain areas. I figured it was because the areas we couldn't go were dangerous so thought nothing of it. I liked where we did travel to. Shifa showed me the National Vanguard Museum, one of the sections having a detailed history of Vanguards development and though it wasn't all that interesting Shifa made it so. She knew here stuff, had a knowledge far beyond her years that I didn't understand how it could be all in her brain. I asked her once if she thought her head would explode if she crammed anymore knowledge in there. She was not impressed and didn't speak to me for an hour, till she got annoyed with my butchering of Vanguard pronunciation, and had to explain it to me.
Dinner in the High Councilor's home was a strange affair. There were so many rules that I had to follow, proper etiquette and all that which made no sense to me but, as I was sitting beside Shifa I was able to get it mastered to a reasonable level. I could follow nowhere near as well as The Doctor but I did pretty well for myself. There was no such thing as desert, no sweet treat for me to eat after I'd finished all the nasty healthy stuff. It was disappointing and after explaining it to Shifa she looked at me like I was crazy.
"Why would you want to eat something like that? Sweets are disgusting."
I couldn't believe what I was hearing, "Chocolate, ice cream, macaroons? What do you eat for a snack?"
She shrugged, "Quita."
Translation: Pineapple, or something very similar and it's disgusting. I don’t like pineapple for one, so why would I like alien pineapple? Everything about Shifa I later categorized about why girls were weird and thus why I didn't like them. This was at the top of my list because who in their right mind could not like macaroons. Especially grandma's homemade macaroons, they're the most amazing thing in the world.
That night as I was exploring my room more in depth because I wasn't yet tired, and probably wouldn't be for another several hours I heard outside the door the High Councilor and the chief soldier who'd escorted Shifa and I around Midgard. They were talking about a different part of Midgard, the part Shifa and I hadn't been allowed to go to. I didn't quite understand what they were talking about but it made me curious and itching to go there and explore.
I waited a little while and snuck to Shifa's room. I woke her up and it too me almost half an hour to convince her to come exploring with me. She was not pleased with whatever it was that made me want to go against her father's rules, but what could I say, I'm a rule breaker. Sneaking out of the mansion was actually quite easy for the two of us, and Shifa was surprisingly adept at it.
Old Midgard was nothing like the area we'd been to earlier. It was part of the lower levels, far less advanced and partially run down. It had a spooky quality to it that, although frightening, intrigued me. It was what made us continue exploring. There were so many foreign smells, exotic and nasty swirling together in a mesh of intricacies that were so amazing they made me giddy inside. Shifa was quite suck up as we walked through the streets, peering at everything and keeping an eye out on where we were going. Which was a good thing because I probably wouldn't have been able to make it back on my own.
Shifa didn't know much about Old Midgard and it was quite obvious by her attitude that she was only mildly interested in the place but was there because I wanted to be. She indulged me and for that I was grateful.
I know with all my heart that I should never have gone down there, I knew it at the time but I thought we were safe. I didn't think any harm would come from exploring, it's what The Doctor and I did all the time. Looking back on it I know that it wasn't the best move to make, because with The Doctor around I at least had someone who could save my life when needed, or just generally fix whatever problems I got myself into.
But I didn't have The Doctor with me, and the problem I'd gotten myself into didn't present itself until the next day, when I woke up. On out little excursion Shifa and I literally ran into a strange man who could speak. He tried to, like he was use to saying words but had somehow lost the ability, and then ran off. We didn't think anything of it, didn't try and find out why, or anything even remotely similar. We just continued to explore until Shifa begged me to go back. I did, because I could see she was getting tired, and by that time I was as well. We went back up to the high end, into the mansion like we'd left and no one found out we'd been gone. I was under the impression no one would find out, but come morning everything changed.
When I woke up it was almost midday. I changed into the fresh pair of clothing that someone had left out for me and made my way to find something to eat. As I passed someone in the hallway I said hi to them. They didn't hear me and it took a moment for me to realize that I didn't hear me. I stopped walking, spoke again and though I was moving my mouth, nothing came out. I screamed, tried whatever I could to make a verbal sound all the while growing more panicked.
I ran to The Doctor, screaming as I went but once I came to the doors to the dining room I closed my mouth. I silently slipped in, The Doctor and High Councilor were at the far end, casually dining though they weren't actually eating anything. They had drinks though, and Shifa was there eating her morning meal.
I walked up to The Doctor and pulled on his jacket. He ignored me and I pulled harder which made him look down at me with a glare before turning back to the High Councilor. Something in me screamed at him for that, because though we rarely ever asked anything of each other, especially me asking something from him because I was so young, whenever I did need him it was always for something important. Ignoring me at that moment made me question what I was to him, if I'd outstayed my welcome because although I didn't know how long we'd been traveling it had been quite a while but that point.
I stood there for a minute in shock before pulling his jacket again. He batted my hand away and in childish rage I smacked him. He turned to me shocked, angry and a whole other host of emotions I didn't recognize.
"What Cameron?" he asked annoyed.
I had his attention now, but I didn't want to 'speak' about it here so I hit him again and ran.
"Cameron!" he yelled at me and I stopped at the doorway and looked back at him suddenly terrified. "Come here, right now."
I wanted to obey, every instinct was screaming at me to do so, but I knew I couldn’t because I didn't want the others to know. I shook my head and left the room quickly. I could hear The Doctor apologizing to the High Councilor and his chair scrape back as he stood. That was when I started running and headed to the TARDIS. It was the only place I really felt safe and it was what I needed at the moment.
I was in my room when he found me, sitting on my bed, wrapped up in my blanket and waiting. He was annoyed, angry, confused and I was just being difficult. He sat on the bed with me, staring at me like I was some sort of mystery to be solved, and perhaps at the time I was because, as I said before, I was being difficult.
"I was having a very important discussion Cameron, you had no right to interrupt me like that," he told me seriously.
I nodded, knowing he was true, and waited.
He sighed, disapprovingly, "You have my undivided attention now Cameron, what is it that you wanted?"
I tried talking to him and like I'd already known, nothing came out. The Doctor looked at me funnily, face all screwed up in a way only he knew how, like he didn't get it. I waved my hands around in a desperate attempt to get him to understand what was going on and it only took me nearly five blood minutes to do so.
"You can't speak," The Doctor mumbled. I nodded rapidly and tentatively inched towards him. He stood up and I felt shafted, because I wanted him to hug me, tell me everything was going to be ok and then run off to find a cure.
He knelt in front of me, "Where did you go Cameron?" He paused for a moment when I didn't answer, "Right. Erm….I know!"
He dashed out of my room and I curled into myself a bit more, wrapped tighter in my blanket because I wanted him right there at that moment and he just couldn't see it. He came back with a notebook and a pen and set in on the bed beside me. I looked at it for a moment before taking them both and began writing. I gave it to him when I was finished and waited for his reaction.
"Cameron," he scolded, "Why did you run off? Didn't you think that there was a reason you weren't allowed to go down to Old Midgard earlier? I'm disappointed in you, you put both yourself and Shifa in danger and now you can't speak! I need to speak to the High Councilor about this, see what exactly is going on. Stay here."
He left me, was gone for what felt like hours during which I curled up into a ball on the far side of my bed, up against the wall and cried till I'd fallen asleep.
O.o.O.o.O.o.O.o.O.
The Doctor has terrible bedside manner, and he was especially terrible at making me feel wanted. Two days after I was suddenly rendered mute we found out I was dying. Something about the Silence Plague I'd caught had mutated and had begun paralyzing me. There was no order to the paralysis. By that time I couldn't feel my legs nor part of my arms. I'd been moved from my TARDIS room so that other doctors could look after me.
I was alone most of the time. Actually not really because Shifa spent most of her time with me, but the one person I wanted there was rarely ever there. I don't know what he was doing nor do I know why he never came to see me.
Shifa sat on the bad with me. It had already been determined that she was, for some reason immune to the Silence, and she would talk to me. Sometime she would read to me, a story usually but when it wasn't it was one of her strange study books. We quickly developed a way for her to realize I wasn't understanding something she was saying. Head nods and deliberate facial expressions let her know when she needed to repeat something or go into it more deeply. It worked for us very well, so well in fact that the doctors asked for her to be our 'translator' when he needed to ask questions.
It was during the time which no one was around that I began to long for my family. I wanted to hear my mother's voice again, use the broomsticks as swords against my brothers, walk into my father's hospital room and continue to hear stories about flying planes even though he would no longer be able to. I missed doing chores, I missed grandma's macaroons and most of all I missed my regular human life.
The Doctor doesn't understand. l don't think it's possible for him too. His entire life has been spent traveling the universe and partaking in everything it has to offer. For him, this is the normal life. He finds our race so curious yet strange in our guest to retain a normal life. There's no such thing as a normal life. But I wanted to go back to what I was use to, I needed it, because, though I didn't Know it at the time, l was losing myself. Family didn't much care by that point, and why would it when you're off traveling the stars. But, for the first time since leaving home I missed them, and I remembered what it was like being with them, and I missed them even more.
I began to hate The Doctor for showing up, for offering to show me the universe. Why did he have to do this to me, show me what was really out there? Why did I have to agree?
A lot of these thoughts seem too deep for a mere ten year old but I was never a mere ten year old to begin with. I was always at the top of my class and had a comprehension far better than anyone else. It was why, when I started using far more complex words and numbering that they believed I truly was turning into a genius.
Shifa once told me she was sorry. Sorry for what I don't know because she didn't have anything to be sorry for. I think she felt bad about me getting sick and her staying perfectly healthy, but it was never her fault. I was the one who had dragged us down there. Still, l had wished The Doctor had thought it punishment enough that I was dying and come visit me.
As the paralysis took hold of more and more of my body Shifa was allowed to visit me less and less. The day's passed by so slowly. With nothing to do I began to think more and more of home, what I'd do when I returned. There was so much I could do, I vaguely remembered that my birthday was coming up. I vaguely remembered that Raymond's birthday had just past and that Connor was really angry he had to wait until nearly the end of the year before his own birthday. I was so lost in my own little world that I didn't realize the paralysis had hit my neck.
I actually thought I would die. All the faith that I had in The Doctor saving me was gone. He meant nothing to me, no one meant anything.
I had a nightmare that Darien, the astral squid person, had actually been able to eat my heart, but that I hadn't actually died. I still walked around in my body, but it was dead. I was dead. Everything around me was dead because for some reason, my heart had given Darien a power he could never have dreamed of.
I woke up, and I would have been crying, if I'd been able to. During that nightmare every last control over my body I'd had was taken away and I knew I was going to die that day if I wasn't cured. Those were the worst hours of my life. I couldn't move anything, couldn't open my eyes to see and it was increasingly getting harder to breath. I morbidly wondered if I would die first from heart failure or suffocation, which wasn't something I should have thought of.
Obviously, I didn't die. I later found out that it was the fault of the High Councilor that the Silence had broken out. All the Councilors had used the people as tests to see if the Silence Plague worked and what effect it would have on different people. They'd had it pretty contained and controlled until I'd shown up and started dying. From the blood of the High Councilor, which had been used to initially create the plague, the Doctor had synthesized me a cure.
I recovered on the TARDIS. After making sure I was able to be moved The Doctor had transferred me because he no longer trusted the High Councilor. He sat over me vigilantly, running his hands through my hair. It was a comfort as I slowly regained control of everything but I hated him for it. I hated that he thought he could win me back by being there now, completely forgetting his absence, or ignoring it. He had another thing coming, he really did.
It took me four days to recover fully. When I woke up I went out into the main room of the TARDIS where The Doctor was at the controls, fiddling with them.
"So," The Doctor said as I walked in. "I was thinking maybe Deva Loka. Pretty planet, paradise too so I know there'll be no problems. What do you say?"
"I want to go home."
I've never seen The Doctor's face fall like that, never seen the light in his eyes go out like that. He was just suddenly cold, suddenly unresponsive and for a moment I regretted that things had come to this but he had already hurt me, and I just wanted to go home.
"I want to go home Doctor."
His response was stiff and silent. A nod before he began adjusting the TARDIS controls and setting us of. He didn't talk, didn't try to convince me to stay, or even ask me why I wanted to go home. He didn't look at me, I didn't look at him and even the TARDIS seemed to be sad.
We landed with a particularly jolting thud and I immediately ran out the door, not even bothering to say good bye. Not listening to him as he called me back earnestly. I didn't care, because all I wanted to do was go home.
Chapter Four
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comment cause i have to xD
Date: 2009-02-05 01:03 am (UTC)Re: comment cause i have to xD
Date: 2009-02-05 01:26 am (UTC)